My Best Friend

A friend told me
That I don't deserved to be lonely
He said we all born to be happy
And live life joyfully


He try to make me laugh,
To make me smile..
He makes me feel comfortable,
In short,
He became my night and shining armor


This friend of mine is
very brave..
you will not seen him
any shed of tears.
His tears is His SMILES.

I tried to be just like him.
to smile even if hurts.
Smile even if it fakes me.
and Smile..
even if it kills me.

I like him to see
me happy.
so that he will not be
worried anymore.
so that he will remember me
as a strong girl whom she carried
all the way..

and my efforts
have been resulted a success

I learn how to be happy.
Because he shows me.
how to feel...



HAPPINESS :)

S o r r y

i am at the middle

of nowhere..
don't know where to
start my new life
now that am without you

i know it is awkward to say but
i am still hoping
for your return
i am still holding to the
pieces of my heart
that has been broked by you

i am still praying
that this heart that
is once been your part
will be with you
for the rest of my life..

if only i can erase
the fact what you've
done to me was easy to
be forgiven..
i maybe holding you now
as close and tightly as i could..

at this very moment..
my tears is running
down my face..
the face that once
you've touch..
the face that once
you've kissed..

it is so hard..

hard to ease the
pain i am feeling
at this time..

i know..
I've hurt you..
many times..
and i admit..
i have flaws which
maybe the reason
why decided to left me..

i understand..

i understand even if
it tears me apart..
and worst killed me..

at this point.
me,myself don't know
what is my plan.
because my mind only knows.
our plan..
the plan that is combined
by the mind of the two of us ..

the house..
the children..
the place..
and even our
future dates for
the incoming years for us together..

but we are now separate lives
new life
new journey
hatreds and happiness..
without each other hands..

i would like to take
this opportunity..
to thank you for the love
the pain..
the sufferings..
you've done to make me stay..

also for the memories
memories which will be tied
to my heart and to my whole entire life

sorry that i failed to love
you more than myself.
sorry for disappointing you..
sorry for not giving you your part..
sorry for my selfish acts..

but this time..

i'll give it all back
back to where you should be..
and where you belong..
and my last word will be..
I LOVED YOU,
SORRY for making you
love me too.

A L O N E

why do i felt this way?
how can i heal my broken heart?
why nobody wants to love me?
why is everybody going out of my way?

what should i do?
i feel so alone
i am so afraid to face the fact
that your already gone
but why do you have to force me
like this?

how can i forget you?
how can i get you out of my damn life?
how can i get you out of my heart?
how can i?

can you please help me?
how can i forget the time we
spent together?
where we shared laughters
and downfalls ..

i can't help it anymore
i want to fix this unfortunate life
but why do i need to suffer
this much?
just because you are on
her arms tonight

This heartache..

it leads me to my deepest
weakness..
i don't wanna be alone
i want to build my world around you
but what I've done?

i made you cry and worst
i made you suffer having me
and now..
i know your happy enough
enough for me to face
the reality that your truly gone

while i am here ..
here in a cold dark place..
where i sat under our promise tree
and thinking..
" can someone saves me? "

Hatred of the Past

once. . there was a girl
she is very popular because she is
hated by everyone..

since she was a kid..
she was hated and fake by everyone in her class.
she's not smart, just an average..

she's sweet
she's friendly
she's very joyful
but her classmates misinterpret her always.

she have been bullied many times.
she have suffer so much just to get the love she desire..
a Friend.
a friend who will never lie to her.
a friend who will help her.
a friend who will guide her..
and since she was hated at the first place...
no one seems to care..


she became independent
she cried every night after a long day
she blame herself that helps lower her self esteem
and provoked her to commit suicide.

she is thirst of love
she is thirst of joy
she is thirst of having a friend.

then.

One day comes..
she stand all by herself.
she learn how to fight for her rights
she learn how to be strong
she do everything she knew to make her happy..
but everyone seems to be annoyed seeing her happy
so they planned to let her feel down.

and they succeed.

they saw the girl cried.
she shout out loud and expressed her inner thoughts to everyone..
but it is still the same..

NO ONE LOVES HER.
NO ONE CARES.
NOBODY~